How NOT to Spend Your Typical School Night

If you are wondering what to do on your typical school night, I have some advice. As you can tell by the title, I learned this by experience.

Firstly, do not substitute cleaning the entire house for playing Outdoor Hiding House. If your mom tries to bribe you by suggesting Sonic for dinner instead of cold leftovers, don’t give into temptation. However, if you do give into temptation, don’t enjoy your calorie filled cheeseburger, apples and caramel sauce, and soda.

Secondly, do not, under any circumstances, go into an outlet mall at seven o’clock. Especially don’t go in it if you have any cranky children. I assure you that it will be a nightmare if it is a cold night and you go into the mall, but if you do go into the mall, I still have a list of things you should not do. Do not go into a series of shops making boring returns, I am positive your children will protest. And also don’t go shopping at multiple mysterious grown-up shops, for those will make your children crabs.

Finally, do not be tempted to appease your tired, grumpy children with overpriced cookies. For you run the risk of one of those delectable cookies breaking into pieces and falling to the ground leaving two of your children in tears. 

Not that we would ever spend our evenings in this way- I was just thinking of ways I could help my friends.

-M.S